The Gunpowder Plot

Part One

On Friday the 15th of august, Yvonne Atkins was sitting in the visiting room at Larkhall prison, thankfully by this time on the right side of the table, not on the same side as the inmates.  Yvonne had been out of prison since Christmas, and never intended to return.  The inmate she was visiting and whom she had visited religiously every fortnight since her release, was Denny Blood.  Denny was always happy to see Yvonne, and Yvonne never failed to have a smile for her.  But this week, Yvonne's attention wasn't given to her as good as adopted daughter in as undivided a fashion as it usually was.  Denny grabbed hold of Yvonne's hand and shook it. 

"Everything okay?" Yvonne looked up, startled.  "You were somewhere else, man." 

"I'm sorry," Yvonne said, totally mollified.  "Coming back to this place and knowing that Snowball Merriman isn't so far away from here isn't so easy to deal with this week." 

"She's up on trial next week, innit.  They've been keeping her down the block for a fortnight now, and Al Friggin McKenzie's doped up to the eyeballs all day.  Jesus, you'd think she was on trial, not Merriman."  Yvonne looked slightly worried. 

"Can you do something for me, Denny? You're still in the dorm with razor head, aren't you." 

"Yeah, I've had the pleasure of her company for more than a year now." 

"Well, all next week, can you try and make sure she doesn't get her hands on any gear.  The last thing we need is for her to be stoned in the witness box, and we don't need her doing cold turkey either." 

"I'll do my best, but you know what it's like in here, drugs is one of the easiest things to hide." 

"Just try for me.  I need Alison McKenzie to be as sharp as her haircut." 

"Yvonne," Denny continued slowly, "Snowball is gonna go down, isn't she? 'Cause if she doesn't, and she's put back on the wing, I swear I'll kill her."  Yvonne reached forward and gripped Denny's shoulders. 

"Listen to me, Denny.  I know you're still hurting over Shaz, and a part of you probably always will, but getting yourself a life sentence isn't what Shaz would have wanted you to do."  Denny's voice rose. 

"And how the hell do you know that? You never even liked her!" Yvonne took a deep breath. 

"Denny," She said quietly.  "Shaz loved you.  I might not have known her very well, but I sure as hell know she wouldn't have wanted you to get sent back here for years on end.  We all want Snowball to get sent down for what she did to Shaz, all of us Denny.  I think Shaz would want you to be strong for her now.  I need you to promise me you're gonna be okay over the next fortnight, because by the time your next visiting comes round, we'll probably know one way or the other.  Can you promise me that, Denny?"  Tears were visibly falling down Denny's cheeks by this time. 

"Yeah, okay," She said shakily.  Yvonne handed her a tissue and then gave her a hug. 

"I love you, man," Said Denny.  This touched Yvonne enormously and to her slight shame it brought tears to her eyes. 

"I love you too, Denny, and I'll be here to see you every fortnight till you get out.  I promise."  As the bell rang for the end of visiting, Yvonne gave Denny one last squeeze.  As Denny was led away by Yvonne's old nemesis, Sylvia, Karen Betts gently approached her. 

"Are you okay?" She said quietly.  Yvonne tried to surreptitiously wipe her eyes. 

"I sure as hell know that Denny isn't," She said as a way of avoiding the question.  "Please could someone keep an eye on her this weekend, because until that bitch is made to pay for Shaz's death, Denny can't even try and move on." 

"Yvonne, I'll do what I can, but she isn't the only one on the edge because of the trial being next week." 

"I don't want her pulling any stunts with a rope or a razor and the state she was in today, nothing would surprise me." 

"Spoken like a true mum," Said Karen.  all Yvonne could say in response was,

"Denny means a lot to me." 

Over a year ago, Yvonne would never have been so frank with any prison officer, but having made it her mission to visit Denny every fortnight since she'd been released, Yvonne and Karen had continued to develop their friendship from those first tentative days when Ritchie had been in hospital, and Karen's career had been threatened with privatisation.  After Yvonne's visits to Denny, it was not uncommon for Karen and Yvonne to catch up over a drink in a nearby bar.  they shared a love for good scotch and good cigarettes, which had only assisted in the gradual building of their friendship.  When Karen had asked Di Barker to make sure someone kept an eye on Denny, Yvonne said,

"Are you busy tonight?" 

"Actually," Said Karen, "I'd planned to wade my way through a load of applications seeing as I'm not going to be here for much of the next couple of weeks, so no, I'm not busy at all."  Karen displayed the clear lack of dedication to her paperwork with a small grin. 

"Would you like to come round for dinner?" Yvonne didn't know where this invitation had come from and seemingly neither did Karen.  "If I'm honest," Said Yvonne, "Lauren’s going out clubbing with Cassie and I could do with some intelligent company."  Karen laughed. 

"Now I know you're getting desperate.  But yes, that'd be nice.  It'll give me an opportunity to finally see this infamous place of yours." 

"I won't ask what you've heard about my house," Said Yvonne smiling and rifling through her pockets.  Not finding what she wanted she asked,

"Have you got a pen?" As Karen handed her a pen and a piece of paper, they suddenly stared at each other.  This was exactly the routine Ritchie had gone through with Karen that first time he had visited Yvonne.  He had asked Karen for a pen, to write down his mobile number, and here was another Atkins asking Karen for a pen to write down an address.  Neither of them mentioned the feeling of Deja Vu, but it was something to be filed away, to be dealt with when its relevant time for examination arrived.  As Yvonne walked out to her car, and Karen walked up to her office, Karen's thoughts drifted back to that day when everything for this trial had been set in motion.  Where would her life have been, she thought, had they all not been preparing for Larkhall's most monumental trial since the Nikki Wade appeal.  What would they all be doing, had snowball Merriman and Ritchie Atkins not been charged. 

Part Two

Karen’s gaze was riveted to the little white card with the floral swirl in the corner. This had accompanied the bouquet of flowers that Yvonne had tenderly cared for, her reassurance of Ritchie’s love for her which looked so innocent in its purity of form but she knew now was a baited trap. "Don't place your Bets till the rod's in K's bag. Love you mum. Ritchie."

Her lips twisted in contempt at it. She studied the script carefully and looking closer, she took in the smooth regularity of writing of the last few words. “Love you mum, Ritchie.”  

This must have been written by the woman at Interflora as she took down Ritchie’s words as he dictated the order and at least the woman at Interflora was genuine, as genuine as anyone doing her job as a profession to the best of her ability, as genuine as she is as Wing Governor in a women’s prison. Or then again, knowing herself what a lazy arse Ritchie is, he probably asked the woman to write something ‘dead nice, as a present for a mother’ and it was probably her words, not his. Yet, Snowball must have inserted extra  words on the card to fit her twisted schemes . It must have been from how Jim Fenner described the scene. Irony upon irony, that she trusts a devious misogynist rapist bastard over an even more devious scheming murdering cow.

She looked at it and, she had to hand it to Snowball, it was a very clever, pretty accurate copy of the original words, written by a woman who had all the time in the world to scheme and connive. The script was formed in a likeness of  an average caring human being but somehow lacking the master touch as Snowball does. Still, it was good enough to fool an average person in a hurry, even good enough to fool Jim Fenner, of all people. And, the perfect Snowball touch, it appeared to give a guarded message that Ritchie was planning with Yvonne Atkins to arrange a breakout, what more natural for a loving son to do for his mother, when all the while, it was just another deception, just another act. Karen’s lips tightened in anger as she carefully took the card to hand it to the police who were waiting to interview her.                                                                                                          

At another disconnected point in time, Karen strode into the PO’s room, which had its familiar workaday atmosphere, untidy files in the corner and Sylvia’s ‘Charles and Di’ mug in its rightful place. She was grinning to herself when she brought in a copy of the Sun with Larkhall’s middle pages spread how the unselfish PO’s of Larkhall apprehended a dangerous and notorious woman murderer while on a ‘fishing trip’ to Amsterdam. A badly composed ‘police picture’ of Shell Dockley was positioned left of centre in all of its sinister unreality and the spokesman, Jim Fenner, reassured the readership that they were not on a ‘porn fest.’ The ‘cracking down on crime’ story wrote itself in the minds of the Sun readers but she knew better. On any other day than today, she would have cheerfully pinned it on the notice board to see the bastard squirm but not today. The paper was discreetly hidden away amongst the bunch of files she was holding.

Jim Fenner spotted the paper and gave her a sideways scowl, wondering what she was going to do with the paper.

“Right, if Di hasn’t told you already, the number one is back in the building today.”

“Honeymoon over already.” Di’s mournful tones told their own story.

“I’ve just had the preliminary report of the police investigation into the bomb explosion in the library and I am happy to say,” and here Karen felt the enormity of announcing the history to be written “that they consider that there is sufficient evidence for charges to be pressed. Snowball Merriman is to be charged with arson and manslaughter and Ritchie Atkins is to be charged as an accessory……. “

A round of cheers swept the room and cut short the speech Karen had carefully planned to hit the right note, not ‘string up the bitch’ and not going soft on her either. For the first time in her life, she saw Sylvia positively beaming at her and Fenner, for once, genuine in his praise for her and that the ‘lads at the CPS weren’t letting us down.’ The glow of satisfaction Karen had felt when she first opened the report was relived in the very palpable feelings of solidarity amongst the PO’s, between the unlikeliest of allies and Karen gave herself in to that feeling. After all, she was as steeped in its tradition as anyone even though she loathed the part of it that treated prisoners as animals

“Jim,” Karen eventually said. “You can go down the block and tell Merriman that she can stay there for her own protection. You’ll need to have some thoughts about the trial as both of us are bound to be called as witnesses, you as her personal officer and me as Wing Governor and the part we played in the fire and the run up to it. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you but you’ll need to be absolutely clear of everything in your mind.”

“Right, Karen.” Jim Fenner’s face wore its usual impassive professional mask

Karen went on to announce that Buki Lester’s burns are healing well but she was to be kept on the hospital wing for another week and announced the offer of listening therapy for those who survived the fire but Karen was aware that the news was only half heard. as the prison officers left the room, cheering.

Yvonne could remember that moment as she stood with Denny watching the packed PO’s room and wondered as always what the screws were cooking up there. At that time Betts was ‘one of them’, she reflected in amusement now,

“What’s the screws sounding so happy about, Denny?” Yvonne remembered asking.

“They’re sending us to Alcatraz and they’ve won the lottery. Nothing else could make them so happy, man.”          

In the PO’s room, Karen remained behind, her smile beginning to fade. Life’s irony dictated that the man she most loathed and detested and who had raped her was destined to be in the same witness box as her, on the same side. Nailing Snowball and Ritchie wasn’t going to be as easy as the PO’s think.

Jim Fenner walked down the narrow stone steps to the bowels of the ancient building and strolled the few dark yards to the block. Wrenching the door open, he stared with loathing at Snowball.

“Good old British justice, eh. Get out of your strips. Looks like you’ll be charged with setting off the bomb that’s got your fingerprints written all over it, oh and murdering Shaz Wiley. The only appearance you’ll make on stage is in the dock of the Old Bailey. Don’t think there’ll be any paparazzi after you though.” At moments like these, Fenner got a kick out of laying it on with a trowel and seeing them squirm. PC conscious Betts and Stewart always disapproved but what’s wrong with a little bit of private vengeance?

“You can sign an Ap and you can stay on voluntary segregation till your trial date comes up.” Fenner finished, deliberately playing his pauses before speaking to wind Snowball up.

“You mean, I have a choice of going back to the wing?” Snowball looked at Fenner with disbelieving eyes, trying to focus on his face in the gloom to figure out what game he was playing. He was like a so-called Hollywood agent, only with a British accent.

“Not if it was up to me.” Fenner replied shortly.

Snowball studied the piece of paper. Never sign any contract blind, all the books about Hollywood told her. Then she casually ripped it up to Fenner’s incredulous eyes. The cow really does want to die.

“ The show must go on, Mr. Fenner." Snowball said with that sneer in her voice.

What is the silly cow after, Fenner thought. Atkins and Blood, for a kick off will tear her to pieces. Then he looked carefully in Snowball’s defiant face and noticed the way that Snowball kept that lock of fair hair hanging down her cheekbone instead of pulled back to show off her face in all her vain self absorbed perfection. After all, that was what Hollywood actresses were like, she’s read it in the magazines. Fenner leant forward and brushed that lock of hair back and saw the ugly marks left by Atkins’ talons.

“What, phantom of the opera.” He sneered to Snowball’s discomfiture.

“I’m not scared once the girls have heard my side of the story.”

“You must think that your tits are made of Teflon. Don’t you know what they’ll do to a murdering bitch who killed one of their own?” Fenner goaded her one last time before slamming the door shut on her.

Part Three

As Yvonne drove towards home, she wondered just what had possessed her to invite Karen round for dinner.  This was Yvonne Atkins here, and Yvonne Atkins never did things on the spur of the moment.  At least, not until now it seems.  She pulled in to the Tesco car park and briefly wondered what on earth she could cook.  She wandered aimlessly round the supermarket for a while, trying to dredge up some inspiration.  Eventually, she picked up some vegetables for a salad, as well as some good-looking strawberries and a couple of very nice fillet steaks.  One of the best things for Yvonne about being out of prison, besides the obvious comfort of her own large house with the added bonus of a swimming-pool, was being able to spend pretty much what she liked.  There was no more Body bag telling her how many cigarettes she could have or that she couldn't have any for a fortnight because the prison was on lock down. 

When she reached home, she put the food in the fridge, and as it was only five o'clock and Karen wasn't due till after seven, Yvonne went for a swim in her incredibly decadent outdoor pool.  Charlie might have been one of the biggest bastards she'd ever known, but when it came to houses he'd certainly had style.  It had been his idea to have the pool put in when Lauren and Ritchie had still been at school.  As the sun beat down on her and she lay on her back, gently drifting from one end to the other, Yvonne felt like all the dirt from the prison was slowly being washed out of her soul.  It didn't matter that Yvonne had spent nearly four years in that place, every time she went to visit Denny, she came away feeling filthy, as if the very air of the place could insinuate its way under her skin.  After half an hour of luxuriating in the warm tranquility of her garden, she showered to get the chlorine out of her hair and renewed her make up.  Yvonne had been and always would be a proud woman.  Not even for someone who was becoming a close friend would she present a face devoid of cosmetic enhancement. 

As Karen drove passed Sloan Square tube station and along Sloane street itself, she reflected that this was one part of London where she would never be able to shop.  Only someone like Yvonne or Cassie could afford to frequent the many fashionable boutiques that came in to her line of vision.  But as she drove further out of the city center and towards the suburbs, she began to wonder just what the Atkins house would look like.  It's a well known fact that you can tell a lot about a person by what they have on their coffee tables, but Karen knew that this evening's date for want of a better word would certainly be a learning experience.  When she finally pulled up in front of the address Yvonne had scribbled down for her, she was stunned. 

"So, this is how the other half lives," She thought as she made her way through the small group of very expensive cars on the wide expanse of driveway in front of the house.  She recognised Yvonne's red Farari but she couldn't put an identity to any of the others.  As she rang the doorbell, she had a burning curiosity to see the rest of the house and possibly a deeper level to see how it's occupant lived. 

When Yvonne heard the doorbell, she put down the knife she'd been using to chop the salad, dried her hands on a tea towel and, wondering quite what she thought she was doing, went to answer the door.  Yvonne's large black Alsatian, Trigger, had ran in to the hall and was stood staring at Karen through the glass, giving her an impression of enormous gaping jaws and huge pointed teeth.  Yvonne only had to yell,

"Shut up!" once for it to calm down.  When she let Karen in, she said, "Don't worry, he's all talk and no action these days like most blokes."  Karen stepped in to the hall and after handing Yvonne a bottle of Chablis, she bent down to stroke the dog.  Karen hadn't had a dog since her childhood, and to suddenly become acquainted with one was a bit like coming home. 

"What's his name?" She asked Yvonne, letting the dog sniff her hand, almost as if to reassure him she wasn't any enemy. 

"his name's Trigger," Grinned Yvonne, pleased to see Karen so at home with one of the fixtures of her household.  "Charlie named him after his favourite hobby."  As the full meaning of this hit Karen, she straightened up and stared at Yvonne.  After a slightly stunned silence where Karen wondered if any other household animals would be named after the parts of a gun, both women laughed.  It seemed to break the ice.  Leading Karen through to the kitchen, Yvonne asked her what she would like to drink. 

"I'd love a scotch if there's one going," Said Karen, knowing that whisky would feature prominently in any place Yvonne stayed for any length of time.  When Yvonne had put the Chablis in the fridge and poured them both a scotch, she returned to preparing the salad. 

"Can I do anything to help?" Asked Karen.  Yvonne smiled. 

"No thanks, it's fine.  I got salad, fillet steaks and strawberries, is that okay?" 

"Wonderful," Sighed Karen in anticipation.  "I haven't had anyone cook for me after a hard week's work for a long time."  Yvonne placed the prepared salad and the washed strawberries in the fridge and picked up her glass. 

"I bet your curiosity's on overdrive," She said, leading Karen out to the garden. 

"Just a little," Admitted Karen ruefully.  "It isn't every day I get to see the house that I've been speculating about for nearly a year."  She tactfully left out the fact that Yvonne's having very obvious criminally earned money behind her would clearly be a factor in this speculation. 

"Charlie bought this place when Ritchie was seven and Lauren was three.  I think he was planning for more kids to fill up the space.  The house itself was quite small then but we just kept adding to it."  Leading Karen across the terrace and toward the steps that went down to the pool, she said, "He put this in when Ritchie was in his teens."  when Karen saw the oval pool with steps at one end, and a mosaic of two entwined dolphins on the bottom, she just stared. 

"I never knew people had outdoor pools this close to central London."  Yvonne realised that this was Karen's way of trying to cover up her shock and awe of seeing just what the Atkins money had been spent on over the years.  Trigger had followed them outside and now made his way round to the other side of the pool where began a long stretch of lawn which eventually ended in trees and a high stone wall.  He lay down in the shade of one of the trees and lazily thumped his tail.  They sat down under a green tasseled umbrella and Karen, for the first time that day began to relax.  They both lit up cigarettes and Yvonne said,

"Charlie might have been a wanker of the highest order, but when it came to building, he did have style."  Karen grinned. 

"And I know that with most men like Charlie Atkins, most of the decorating will have been left to his wife.  You should be very proud of this place."  Yvonne smiled widely. 

"Cheers.  Here's to the end of what's probably been a horrendous week for you." 

"I won't disagree with that," Said Karen taking a long drink of her scotch.  "when I left them this afternoon, Di and Sylvia were arguing over who wasn't going to take Merriman to court next week." 

"Can't Fenner do any of it?" Asked Yvonne. 

"No, not while he's appearing as a prosecution witness he can't." 

"So they both want the joys of accompanying a psychopath to the dock?" Yvonne was slightly astounded. 

"I think Di Barker gets off on the notoriety of it all, and Sylvia just wants a day out.  Supervising one worthless con has to be easier than supervising fifty.  At least that's how she sees it." 

"Typical Body bag," Yvonne laughed.  Karen grinned. 

"Do you know something, people have called her that ever since I've been at Larkhall." 

"I might be wrong," Replied Yvonne, "But I think it was Zandra who came up with that one." 

"I shouldn't say it," Said Karen, clearly having no qualms about it at all, "But it suits her." 

After a while, they went in and Yvonne briefly grilled the two excellent-looking steaks.  Putting the two plates and the bowl of salad on a tray with some cutlery, Yvonne stood in front of the large wine rack which took up a good proportion of one kitchen wall.  Eventually selecting a bottle of Château Neuve de Pape and putting it on the tray with two glasses, she carried it outside and they ate under the evening sun.  Karen having taken notice of the stock of equally good reds and whites in the wine rack said,

"Who's the wine buff around here then?"  Yvonne smiled. 

"A fascination with good wine was probably the one saving grace my father ever had," She said, swallowing a mouthful of medium-rare steak.  "It's something I guess I inherited from him.  Charlie used to act to his mates like he knew one from the other, but he always used to get me to pick them out beforehand."  Karen laughed. 

"So you didn't take part in any brewing in Larkhall?" She hadn't known whether or not Larkhall and Yvonne's time there would be a safe subject, but the full bodied red in her glass had given her courage. 

"Good god, no," Said Yvonne in disgust.  "That stuff the Costa Cons made was vile.  If I wanted any alcohol in there I made sure it came in already bottled."  As the evening progressed, Karen gradually found it easier and easier to relax on Yvonne's territory.  Yvonne didn't flaunt her wealth, it was simply something that was part of her and that she accepted as being part of her.  Yvonne lived a rich, sometimes decadent life simply because she could, not because she desperately needed it.  Yvonne knew herself well enough to know that possessions didn't make a person what they were, but what that person did with their possessions.  Karen began to see Yvonne's surroundings as just part of the way Yvonne had lived for a long, long time.  They hadn't prevented Yvonne from suffering one of the worst fates any human being can suffer, to be locked up behind bars for a number of years.  Under her expensive clothes and behind the appearance of her house, her pool and the wine she liked to serve, Yvonne was still a normal woman, capable of being hurt by the same things as Karen, and just as vulnerable to the whims of a man she had once loved.  They passed a relaxing evening, finding it easier to talk the more wine they consumed, until Yvonne found herself wondering why she'd never asked Karen over before.  When Karen eventually left, full of steak and strawberries, and a little too much wine to drive, she felt content.  Yes, the trial was starting on Monday, but tonight had been wonderful.  Tonight had been for both of them, the calm before the storm. 

Part four

“Your round or mine, Lauren” Cassie asked, and the very attractive dark haired woman made her way to the bar in the spacious pub they had taken themselves to.

Cassie smiled nostalgically to herself that this was the place that had been the start of many of her affairs in the past. Besides, she felt comfortable here.

Lauren was very gratified at the good service at this pub. Cassie had chosen well. No sooner had she got to the front of the queue than the barmaid smiled in a very friendly way and had served her with a couple of glasses of white wine. She could think of some places where she was propping up the bar for ages trying to get served, trying to catch the barmaid’s eye and tut-tutting under her breath that the silly cow was almost deliberately ignoring her and serving some guy who thought he was God’s gift to women who had jumped the queue. This barmaid was dead friendly and had a chat while Lauren paid for their drinks.

It was a typical hot summer’s day and the pub doors were left open and the large overhead brass fan on the ceiling was gently rotating, wafting a tiny flavour of cool air to the table where Cassie and Lauren sat.

“Is it girls night out here, Cassie? Only a couple of guys here and they aren’t exactly my type. Julian Clarry never exactly turns me on.”

“You could say that, Lauren.” Cassie smiled to herself. She wondered to herself how a woman like Lauren as street smart as you could get, who had knocked around a lot, who had the Atkins brains hadn’t worked out the obvious. Still, Cassie thought to herself, she was a respectably partnered woman with kids and, really, she chose the pub with the nicest feel about it where she felt comfortable to have a quiet chat with a mate. All the other pubs on a night like this would be packed out solid and you needed to be able to lip-read to have any chance of a natter and ignore the drunks.

“So where’s Roisin then, Cassie.”

Cassie sighed. Since Roisin divorced Aiden, she had thought divorce means,’ good riddance’, ‘you’re history’ but with two children, it wasn’t that easy. They had spent more time with solicitors than she thought possible and all the endless haggling about access and maintenance seemed to be designed to line the pockets of knobbing men in expensive suits speaking in patronizing accents. These sort of guys reminded her of the wankers she had to deal with when she started work in the bank. Roisin had gone up to see Aiden to ask him to look after the children while they attended the trial. It would crop up in school holiday time, something she was starting to be accustomed to as part of her life cycle.

“She’s gone to visit that waste of space and persuade him to look after the kids while the trial’s on. Jesus and I thought I had trouble in handling clients when I worked at the bank. Roisin has the patience of a saint in trying to get Aiden to agree to anything. I’d end up ramming this bottle” and here Cassie gestured to the small bottle on the table” right down his knobbing mouth.”

Lauren smiled in appreciation at Cassie. She hadn’t got many mates and when Cassie first came round to visit Mum on her release, she had got chatting to her and hit it off right away. It made her blink the casual way she talked about her partner and that that partner was a married woman. Hiring hit men who pretended to do pizza deliveries, growing up hearing Charlie’s drug deals going down and strange thuggish enforcers coming round all hours having a drink with Charlie, yes, that was part of her life but where she grew up, everyone was ‘straight.  

“Hi Cassie.” An attractive woman with long dark hair floated by, smiling at Cassie.  ”Thought you’d hidden yourself away.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve got company.” muttered Cassie.  ”Private company, if you know what I mean” glaring daggers at the tart whom she’d once had a fling with once and regretted it.

“I can take a hint, Cassie. Enjoy yourself.” The woman smiled and floated off elsewhere.

“Someone I used to go out with.” Cassie said. ”She’s bad news. No friend of mine either.”

It was moments like this that Lauren found strange. Cassie was a mate like she had had mates before and her sexuality faded into the background nearly all the time. Cassie had a similar very direct quality, less ‘in your face’ than she used to be once. Lauren realised that Cassie was simply insecure when she first met her, wanting her approval as Yvonne’s daughter, very much anxious not to blow it that she overcompensated. It didn’t take long for Cassie to relax. In turn, Lauren learned to drop her guard with her. There weren’t many straight ahead people around in her life that didn’t lie, manipulate, tell all sort of tall stories to impress the Charlie’s of this world. Cassie was a refreshing change. If Lauren was talking a load of crap, Cassie would tell her that but never in a way that would hurt, just out of friendly concern for her.  

“How well did you know my mum in Larkhall?” asked Lauren. Since Mum had come home she had been quiet about her experiences. Sure, Lauren heard all the funny stories like the time Body bag went in and frisked the one genuine solicitor out of the pretend ‘briefs’ that she had fixed up and Lauren laughed along with them. She had seen brief glimpses of it in the times she’d visited Larkhall and the sight of Mum in the orange bib was imprinted on her mind. The letters she’d sent out were obviously written to hide how down she felt sometimes.

“Well,” smiled Cassie, ”In one of my madder moments, I fancied Yvonne and thought I could get off with her. Sorry Lauren” Cassie added hastily.

“It’s all right, Cassie. Mum is over sixteen. She can do what she likes as long as she doesn’t get hooked on some bastard. One is enough.” Lauren’s lips tightened, thinking of Charlie and that scrubber with bleach blond hair the last time she saw him.

“Rest assured. Your mum is totally straight. If I couldn’t pull her, then………..” 

After thinking she’d put her foot in it again, well done Cassie, she loosened up and gently reminisced about Yvonne and the memories that, for all her own brashness and apparent toughness, Yvonne was the real thing. Yvonne was the one whose authority like invisible

strings kept things together. She never forgot the scorn in Yvonne’s eyes when she had been stupid enough to run a betting operation on a fight between Maxi and Shaz. There was no malice in it and the next day or so, Yvonne was back to her old self. There was no moody sulking but if anyone really crossed the line, there was no crawling back.

“You’re a lot like Yvonne, Lauren. She was always talking about you and she thinks the world of you……like I do.” And Cassie, for the first time in her life blushed. For the first time in her knobbing life she’s been with another woman, and what sounded like a ‘chat up’ line wasn’t. It was a simple statement of respect for a woman she knew with stone cold certainty was wiser than herself and her daughter who had that same strength beyond her years.

The evening wended its way along in its delightful way and they ordered in the drinks at regular intervals. The sounds of the bar got louder Lauren could put the booze away and Cassie felt compelled to keep up with her which was a big mistake.

“Can’t take the pace, eh, Cassie. If you can’t stand the heat then stay out of the kitchen.” Lauren’s mocking smile wobbled before Cassie’s eyes, as she thought, oh no, not another drink.

“I’m absolutely pissed, Lauren.” moaned Cassie. I’ll never drink again after this night. Just as well the kids are away, seeing a drunken mum come reeling in.”

Lauren smiled to herself to hear Cassie, that very modern and ‘out gay’ woman, sound so exactly like every other mother she had seen, hyper anxious not to disgrace herself ‘in front of the children’ while to Cassie, the world seemed to be seen through a distorting mirror that kept moving and wouldn’t settle down.

When the landlady called out for last orders, Cassie lurched to her feet and Lauren caught her before she fell. Holding her tightly round the shoulder, Lauren steered the smaller woman towards the exit while the couple cuddling in the corner saw them go in a sentimental haze that another couple seemed happy and set up for the night.

The barmaid sighed to herself. You win some, you lose some. Anyway she was knackered.

In the back seat of the black cab, Cassie was slumped in a corner while Lauren called out to the driver, the other side of the glass grille. She would have to somehow navigate Cassie into the spare bedroom, she thought, as the street lights set against the dark whizzed by and it lurched all the way to Yvonne’s house.

Once managing a three handed trick in fumbling for her keys, nudging the heavy front door open and gripping Cassie tightly so she didn’t slump down on the ground, Lauren needed all her strength to heave Cassie step by step, up the wide green carpeted staircase. Her own room was nearest, she was knackered so, to hell with it, she manoeuvred Cassie through the door. Suddenly she tripped over an object and they both went flying through the air, crash onto her large, comfortable double bed nearby.

Shit, Lauren, I will have woken the dead.

“What the bloody hell are you doing, Lauren?” I’ve known you bring strange fellas back from a night on the town but this is bloody new for you.” Yvonne’s throaty, irritated tones, fresh from suddenly disturbed sleep tones reverberated round the room. Lauren could see her eyes squinting at her as she tried to adjust to the sudden bright light and to make sense of what appeared to be in front of her eyes. She didn’t think Lauren was that type or so she had thought. Lauren blushed a pretty shade of pink with was another new thing for her. Atkins don’t do blushing.

A half-conscious Cassie, crashed out helplessly on Lauren’s bed, sleepily grinned in amusement and seemed to lie there for ages with a nice warm secure feeling inside of her. Above her head with her lover next to her in the same cell, the electric light seemed to stare down at her and describe elegant circles over her head making her dizzy to look at it .Then a well known, authoritative voice seemed to cut through her alcohol haze.

“Jesus Christ, where the hell’s the night shift gone? And what’s this drunken orgy going on here? Lights out everyone.”

Oh shit, that means we’re up for adjudication with Betts tomorrow and we’re going to lose our knobbing privileges. I’m really, really sorry, Roisin babes, she slurred drunkenly, it’s all my fault as she wondered why the knobbing screws didn’t put the light out like they said they would. She wanted to sleep more than anything else right then.